not-tonight/src/data/strings/floor.ts

// Floor dialogue & flavour. Typed const maps, never inline in scene code
// (CONTRACTS.md §7). Tone: Aussie hospitality satire — affectionate, absurd,
// with a moral undertow. Nobody here is a villain; they're just having a night.
//
// NOTE(convention): CONTRACTS.md §7 puts dialogue in `src/data/strings/`, but
// `data/` is LANE-0 territory and lanes commit only inside their owned dirs.
// Parked here; see LANEHANDOVER.md — happy to move it on the reviewer's word.

import type { DrunkStage } from '../../data/types';

/** The three rungs of the cut-off ladder, softest first. */
export type EscalationLine = 'water' | 'done' | 'escort';

export const ESCALATION_LINES: Record<EscalationLine, string> = {
  water: 'Have some water, mate. On the house.',
  done: "Righto — you're done for the night.",
  escort: "Come on. Walk with me. Out you go.",
};

/** What you get back when you pitch it right for their state. */
export const CUTOFF_REPLY_CLEAN: Record<DrunkStage, string> = {
  sober: '"...yeah, nah, cheers?" He drinks the water. Confused, but hydrated.',
  tipsy: '"Aw, legend." She takes the water and means it.',
  loose: '"Yeah fair, fair. Good on ya." He sips it like medicine.',
  messy: '"Nah I get it. I GET it." He shakes your hand for slightly too long.',
  maggot: 'No words. Just a slow, dignified nod, and the walk of the defeated.',
};

/** Too much boot for their state — the whole room watches you overdo it. */
export const CUTOFF_REPLY_SCENE: Record<DrunkStage, string> = {
  sober: '"I have had ONE lemon squash." The booth behind you starts filming.',
  tipsy: '"Mate. MATE. I\'m on my second." Her friends boo you in unison.',
  loose: '"Are you serious? I\'m FINE." He is fine. That\'s the problem.',
  messy: '"Don\'t TOUCH me—" Arms up. Drink goes sideways. Room turns.',
  maggot: 'He goes limp on purpose. All ninety kilos of him. Crowd cheers.',
};

/** Too gentle for their state — they take the water and keep going. */
export const CUTOFF_REPLY_SOFT: Record<DrunkStage, string> = {
  sober: '"Ta." Nothing happened. Nothing was going to happen.',
  tipsy: '"Sweet as." She wanders off, entirely unbothered.',
  loose: '"Yeah yeah, water, love it." Straight back to the bar.',
  messy: '"You\'re a good bloke." He pours the water into a pot plant.',
  maggot: 'He accepts the water, salutes you, and staggers into the dance floor.',
};

/** Muffled through a stall door. They are not coming out politely. */
export const STALL_MUFFLED: readonly string[] = [
  '"Piss off mate, I\'m BUSY."',
  '"Occupied! ...by one person!"',
  '"We are having a private conversation."',
  '"Nobody in here but me and my reflection."',
  '"Two seconds! ...Two more seconds!"',
];

export const STALL_BUSTED: readonly string[] = [
  'The door swings. Two people leave in two directions at four times the speed of sound.',
  'Busted. One goes left, one goes through the smoking door, neither makes eye contact.',
  'They scatter like startled ibises. Someone drops a vape. Nobody comes back for it.',
];

export const STALL_OFF_BEAT = 'Your knuckles land in the gap between kicks. Even the door is embarrassed.';

/** Pat-down patter. Confiscation is a bit, not a punishment. */
export const PATDOWN_INTRO = 'Arms out, mate. You know the drill.';

export const PATDOWN_FOUND: Record<string, string> = {
  baggie: 'Well. That\'s not a mint.',
  flask: 'A hip flask. In this economy.',
  goonSack: 'Sir, this is a licensed venue and that is a pillow of wine.',
  tinnies: 'Two warm tinnies. Warm. That\'s the real crime.',
  kebab: 'An entire kebab. Still wrapped. Honestly? Respect.',
  someoneElsesId: 'This is Kylie. You are not Kylie.',
  budgie: 'That is a live budgie. It is looking at me. Into the bin, mate.',
  vapes: 'Fourteen vapes. Fourteen. Are you a shop?',
  marker: 'Fat marker. We just repainted that cubicle.',
  snags: 'Raw sausages. In your jacket. Why. WHY.',
};

export const PATDOWN_CLEAR = 'Nothing on him. "Told ya," he says, delighted.';
export const PATDOWN_MISSED = 'Time. Whatever\'s left in there walks out the door with him.';

/**
 * Two blokes squaring up. Pub fights start over nothing and everyone involved
 * knows it — keep the stakes stupid so the tension stays funny, and so getting
 * between them reads as defusing a farce, not breaking up a war.
 */
export const FIGHT_CAUSE: readonly string[] = [
  'Someone stepped on someone\'s very white shoe.',
  'A disagreement about whether this song is "the actual version".',
  'One of them called the other one\'s cousin "alright, I guess".',
  'A pool table was, allegedly, next-ed out of turn.',
  'Someone said the kebab shop over the road has "gone downhill".',
  'It is about a text message from 2019.',
];

/** Escalating shove chatter — you hear this before you see anything. */
export const FIGHT_SHOVES: readonly string[] = [
  '"Say it again."',
  '"Nah nah nah, say it AGAIN."',
  '"I\'m not even angry, mate. I\'m not."',
  '"Hold my drink. HOLD it."',
  '"You reckon? You RECKON?"',
];

/** You got between them in time. */
export const FIGHT_BROKEN: readonly string[] = [
  'You step into the gap. Both of them discover they were leaving anyway.',
  'A wall of hi-vis arrives. Suddenly everyone is best mates and very tired.',
  'You say nothing. They remember they have work in the morning.',
];

/** You didn't. */
export const FIGHT_SWUNG: readonly string[] = [
  'The swing lands. So does the drink, the stool, and the mood of the entire room.',
  'One punch, no contact, both on the floor anyway. The room turns on you, not them.',
  'It is over in a second and everyone saw you standing too far away.',
];

/** Kayden, on the radio, when a stampless patron turns up inside. */
export const NO_STAMP_RADIO: readonly string[] = [
  '"Yeah sorry, that one might\'ve been me. Sorry. Sorry."',
  '"He said he was getting his jacket. Forty minutes ago."',
  '"I stamped SOMEONE. Pretty sure I stamped someone."',
];

export const HELP_TEXT =
  'WASD move · TAB uv · E interact · SPACE bang · ESC cancel · R reseed';


/** The floor score: lights on at close, the floor pays out. */
export const SWEEP_UI = {
  open: 'LIGHTS ON. the floor will now tell you what kind of night it was.',
  pickup: 'E — pick it up',
  leave: 'E — call it a night',
  lastOne: "that's the lot. the door is that way.",
  baggiePrompt: 'zip-lock bag: B bin it · SPACE pocket it',
  baggieBinned: 'into the amnesty bin. the bin does not thank you. bins never do.',
  baggiePocketed: 'it goes in your pocket. for the report. obviously. for the report.',
  phoneFound: 'straight into lost property. MUM DO NOT ANSWER can rest.',
  /** {cash} replaced at walk-out. */
  done: 'floor swept. ${cash} better off. the room, finally, is just a room.',
} as const;

/** Radio command (design §6): the staff on the other end of the walkie. */
export const STAFF_RADIO = {
  hint: 'RADIO — 1 bump (mess) · 2 shan (bar) · 3 kayden (rope)',
  hintDoor: 'RADIO — 1 bump (mess) · 2 shan (bar)',
  bumpAck: '*click* yeah boss. seen it. on it. *click*',
  bumpDone: 'bump mopped it and signed it. in that order, worryingly.',
  bumpDistracted: 'bump signed it, then found a phone in the puddle. investigation ongoing.',
  bumpNothing: '*click* nothing to sort boss. floor is immaculate. u ok? *click*',
  shanAck: '*click* shan says say less *click*',
  shanDone: 'shan got a water into them without a single negotiation. artist.',
  shanBotch: 'shan led with "YOUVE HAD ENOUGH." they had not had enough. now everyone is upset.',
  shanNothing: '*click* everyones upright boss. genuinely no idea how *click*',
  cooldown: 'the radio crackles back: mid-task. give it a minute.',
  kaydenAck: '*click* kayden copies. rope shut. kayden salutes. nobody can see him saluting. *click*',
  kaydenCooldown: 'kayden is still holding the rope from last time. white-knuckled. honoured.',
} as const;

/** The smoking-yard joint bust (docs/SCENARIOS.md). Three verbs, none clean. */
export const JOINT_UI = {
  title: 'SOMETHING SMELLS HERBAL',
  smokerLine: 'its uh. a rollie. bush tobacco. very natural',
  bin: 'BIN IT',
  binDetail: 'by the book. into the amnesty bin, into the log',
  pocket: 'POCKET IT',
  pocketDetail: 'for later. for evidence. for whatever',
  slide: "DIDN'T SEE IT",
  slideDetail: 'you were never here. neither was the smell',
} as const;

export const JOINT_RESULTS = {
  binned: 'It goes in the bin. The yard watches it go.',
  pocketed: 'It goes in your pocket. Nobody says anything. Especially you.',
  slid: 'You study the fence line. Excellent fence. The yard exhales.',
} as const;

/** Dazza, later, if word gets around about what is in your pocket. */
export const JOINT_STING = 'a punter says SECURITY is holding. tell me thats a lie. tell me NOW';

/** The vomit protocol (docs/SCENARIOS.md). Sign first, mop second. */
export const VOMIT_UI = {
  splash: 'Someone has redecorated the floor.',
  radio: '"Cleanup near the dance floor. Not a drill. Bring the sign."',
  sign: 'E — deploy the wet floor sign',
  mop: 'E — mop it up',
  signed: 'The yellow sign takes its post. The floor is now officially advisory.',
  mopped: 'Gone. Like it never happened. The mop knows the truth.',
  slip: 'Someone goes over near the puddle.',
} as const;

/** Water station duty (RSA): the humane tool that costs time. */
export const WATER_UI = {
  pickup: 'E — pour a water',
  picked: 'One water, no ice, house cup. The most powerful item in the building.',
  serve: 'E — get some water into them',
  served: 'They take the cup. "Legend." They mean it.',
} as const;

/** Phone confiscation: the influencer's revenge arc. */
export const PHONE_UI = {
  title: 'FILMING THE FLOOR',
  line: 'its CONTENT. people need to know this place goes off',
  confiscate: 'PHONE. NOW.',
  confiscateDetail: 'held at the bar til close. house policy, sort of',
  ask: 'ASK NICELY',
  askDetail: 'faces in that crowd. maybe they get it',
  leave: 'LET IT RIDE',
  leaveDetail: 'free promo. what could a story possibly cost',
  confiscated: 'The phone goes behind the bar. The look you get goes somewhere deeper.',
  askedOk: 'They actually stop. "Yeah nah, fair." The camera sleeps.',
  askedNo: 'They pan, slowly, to you.',
} as const;

export const PHONE_POSTED = {
  good: 'the story went up. the venue looks INCREDIBLE. whoever was on the door tonight, cheers',
  bad: 'the story went up. it caught the wrong five seconds. comments are open',
} as const;

/** The fainter. Plain words only — this one is not a bit. */
export const AID_UI = {
  prompt: "E — they've gone down",
  title: 'THEY\u2019VE GONE DOWN',
  radio: '"Person down on the floor. Give them space. GIVE THEM SPACE."',
  ok: 'They come around on their side. Walked out the back to a taxi. The room starts again, quieter.',
  ambulance: 'The ambulance takes them out the back. The room starts again, but not really.',
} as const;

/** The DJ shift (docs/SCENARIOS.md, design §6). Holding the decks, briefly. */
export const DJ_UI = {
  enter: 'E — hold the decks for a minute',
  exit: 'E — step off the decks',
  handover: 'the resident points at the crossfader, then at you, then leaves at pace toward the toilets.',
  handback: 'the resident returns smelling of the yard. "good hands." highest honour.',
  help: 'B build \u00b7 SPACE drop \u00b7 E step off',
  buildStart: 'the bass ducks out. the room leans in.',
  fizzle: 'the riser runs out of stairs. the bass slinks back in unannounced.',
} as const;

export const DJ_DROP_RESULTS = {
  clean: 'ON the bar. the floor detonates. somebody loses a shoe and does not care.',
  late: 'near enough. the floor forgives. the floor wanted to forgive.',
  clang: 'clanged it. a bartender winces audibly over the PA somehow.',
} as const;

/** Booth requests: id must match REQUEST_HIT in scenes/floor/djShift.ts. */
export interface DjRequestScript {
  id: string;
  line: string;
  hit: string;
  flop: string;
  nah: string;
}

export const DJ_REQUESTS: readonly DjRequestScript[] = [
  {
    id: 'dnb',
    line: 'got any dnb. any at all. i can wait',
    hit: 'the dnb lands. three blokes materialise from nowhere doing the washing machine.',
    flop: 'the dnb clears the middle of the floor like a fire drill.',
    nah: 'he nods slowly and stays exactly where he is. he can wait.',
  },
  {
    id: 'nan',
    line: 'can u play something my nan would know. shes here. shes ninety',
    hit: 'nan goes OFF. the entire floor orbits her. this is her venue now.',
    flop: 'nan is polite about it. the floor is not.',
    nah: 'nan waves at the booth anyway. no hard feelings from nan.',
  },
  {
    id: 'birthday',
    line: 'its my birthday. this is a fact u can verify',
    hit: 'the birthday track hits and the whole room sings at a stranger. he weeps.',
    flop: 'the birthday track dies. he stands in the middle of it, aging.',
    nah: 'he shows you his licence to prove the birthday. you have seen worse proof tonight.',
  },
  {
    id: 'shazam',
    line: '*holds phone against the booth glass* play THIS',
    hit: 'phone song works. she points at you like you invented it.',
    flop: 'the phone song is 34 seconds of someone talking over a boat engine.',
    nah: 'she lowers the phone one centimetre at a time, maintaining eye contact.',
  },
  {
    id: 'slower',
    line: 'somethin slower?? my feet r cooked',
    hit: 'the slow one lands and the couples appear. where were the couples STANDING.',
    flop: 'the energy drops through the floor and into the carpark below.',
    nah: 'she sits on the subwoofer to rest instead. security problem, later, probably.',
  },
  {
    id: 'again',
    line: 'play the one from before again. the DUN DUN one',
    hit: 'the DUN DUN one, again. somehow BIGGER. lightning does strike twice.',
    flop: 'the same song twice reads less like a victory lap and more like a cry for help.',
    nah: 'he hums it to himself on the way back to the floor. dun dun. dun dun.',
  },
];

/** The bartender shift (docs/SCENARIOS.md, design §6). The other side of the counter. */
export const BAR_UI = {
  enter: 'E — jump on the taps for a bit',
  exit: 'E — hand the taps back',
  handover:
    'the bartender unties the apron mid-stride. "orders come to you. nobody cooked gets a pour." gone.',
  handback: 'the bartender reclaims the apron and inspects the till like a crime scene. nods once.',
  help: 'orders come to the taps · E step off',
  title: 'AT THE TAPS',
  serve: 'SERVE',
  serveDetail: 'pour it. its a bar. this is the job',
  water: 'WATER',
  waterDetail: 'the house cup. not what they ordered',
  cutoff: 'CUT OFF',
  cutoffDetail: 'not tonight. the phrase works in here too',
} as const;

/** The order IS the sobriety test — the spelling degrades with the patron. */
export const BAR_ORDER_LINES: Record<DrunkStage, readonly string[]> = {
  sober: [
    'two pots and a lemonade, cheers',
    'schooner of the middle tap please',
    'whats on special. actually doesnt matter, one of those',
    'a pot, and one for me mate whos coming. he said five minutes',
  ],
  tipsy: [
    'same again legend',
    'shots?? no. no youre right. two beers',
    'one of the fancy ones with the... yknow. the fancy ones',
    'a jug! for the table! the table voted!',
  ],
  loose: [
    'mate. mate. two... no. three beers',
    'what did i have last time. that. two of that',
    'somethin strong im celebratin a thing i currently forget',
    'a beer for now and a beer for later. thats time management',
  ],
  messy: [
    'jus one more n then im done sweat',
    'beeer. the yellow one. yeknow the one',
    'whos shout is it. its ur shout. one shout pls',
    'i love this bar. one bar please. i mean beer',
  ],
  maggot: [
    '*points at the taps generally*',
    'u kno wha. surprise me champ',
    '*rests forehead on the counter* ...the usual',
    'im so. okay. one. listen. one',
  ],
};

export const BAR_RESULTS = {
  served: 'poured. they tap the counter twice, which means thanks.',
  servedBreach: 'poured. it took them three goes to find the glass. somebody definitely saw that.',
  water: 'they take the water like its a trick. drink it anyway. improve measurably.',
  waterSnub: '"this is water." it is. "i ordered a beer." they did.',
  cutoff: 'cut off. they leave the bar the way a tide goes out: slowly, and taking things with it.',
  cutoffEarly: 'cut off, two drinks deep, stone sober. they tell the whole queue about you on the way out.',
  writeUpDazza:
    'heads up — someone with a lanyard watched that last pour go into a bloke who could not locate his own mouth',
} as const;

/** The tip economy: cash on the booth glass. */
export const DJ_TIP_UI = {
  /** {tip} replaced with the amount. */
  titleTipped: 'BOOTH REQUEST · ${tip} ON THE GLASS',
  returnLinePrefix: 'back already. ',
  returnLineSuffix: ' *the cash is folded into a little paper crane this time*',
  take: 'TAKE IT. PLAY IT.',
  takeDetail: 'the song owes you nothing now. neither do they',
  free: 'PLAY IT. KEEP YOUR CASH.',
  freeDetail: 'the booth has standards. tonight, anyway',
  nah: 'NAH',
  nahDetail: 'not the song. not the money. nothing personal',
  took: 'the note disappears into the shoe. the request queue watches it happen.',
  freed: 'you wave the cash off and cue it anyway. confusing scenes. good scenes.',
  refused: 'refusing the song is business. refusing the money is personal.',
  /** {total} replaced at step-off. */
  shoe: '${total} in the shoe. the shoe says nothing.',
  sting: 'dazza: hearing the booth takes requests for cash now?? we are not that venue. we are exactly that venue but STILL',
} as const;

/** The pour meter. */
export const POUR_UI = {
  title: 'THE POUR',
  help: 'SPACE — stop the pour · ESC — bail',
  short: 'thats mostly glass. they hold it up to the light, disgusted.',
  clean: 'a proper pour. the glass sweats politely.',
  overflow: 'a criminally heavy pour. someone applauds. the till winces.',
  bailed: 'you put the glass down mid-pour. everyone pretends that was normal.',
} as const;

/** Tabs: the jar of other people's cards. */
export const BAR_TAB_UI = {
  /** {name} replaced with the card name. */
  opened: 'a card lands in the jar. the name on it says {name}. start a tab? apparently youve already agreed.',
  title: 'THE CARD BACK',
  lines: [
    'my card. the black one. or blue. its got a bank on it',
    'im heading off. card. the one with my name on. classic card',
    'card please champ. ill know it when i see it. i will not',
  ],
  /** {drinks} and {total} replaced on a clean handback. */
  closed: '{drinks} drinks on it. ${total}. they sign something that is legally a drawing.',
  wrong: 'they leave with someone elses card. somewhere, a direct debit changes hands.',
  unclaimed: 'they gave up waiting for the card and left. the jar keeps it. the jar keeps everything.',
} as const;

export const DJ_REQUEST_UI = {
  title: 'BOOTH REQUEST',
  play: 'PLAY IT',
  playDetail: 'give the floor to them. see what it does with it',
  nah: 'NAH',
  nahDetail: 'the set has a plan. the plan is not this',
  later: 'AFTER THIS ONE',
  laterDetail: 'the diplomatic no. sometimes they remember',
  laterQuiet: 'they nod and drift off satisfied. for now.',
  laterGrudge: 'they came back. they remembered. they brought a mood.',
} as const;